If you’re a people-pleaser, “no” rarely comes out as a clean no.

It comes out as:

• a long explanation

• a nervous yes

• “maybe”

• “I’ll try”

• “I can squeeze it in” (even though you can’t)

Because the real fear isn’t the task — it’s the moment someone might be disappointed in you.

The mindset shift

A boundary is not a debate.
It’s information.

You’re not asking permission to have limits.
You’re communicating what’s realistic.

The 2-sentence no)

Sentence 1: clear limit

“I can’t take that on this week.”

Sentence 2: optional alternative (if true)

“I can do X by Friday, or I can pick it up next week.”

That’s it.
No apology paragraph. No life story.

If they push back

You don’t need a new explanation.
You need the same boundary, repeated calmly.

“I get it, and I still can’t take it on this week.”

This can feel intense at first. That’s normal.
You’re building a new skill.

A quick reality check before you reply

Ask yourself:

• If I say yes, what will I lose? (sleep, sanity, time, resentment)

• If I say no, what will I protect? (health, integrity, sustainability)

People-pleasing often trades long-term wellbeing for short-term comfort.
Boundaries reverse that.

General information only — not personal psychological advice.