Most of us have a “fix it” reflex. If something feels uncomfortable (anxiety, guilt, sadness, anger, shame) the instinct is to get rid of it as quickly as possible. That makes sense. But sometimes the effort to eliminate feelings becomes the very thing that keeps us stuck: overthinking, avoiding, pushing through, numbing out, or waiting to feel “better” before we do the things that matter.

Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) offers another option.

ACT (pronounced “act”) is an evidence-based therapy approach that focuses on building psychological flexibility — the capacity to notice what’s happening inside you, make room for it, and still move in a direction that aligns with what matters to you. It’s not about forcing positivity. It’s about learning how to carry difficult internal experiences more lightly, so they don’t run the show.

A Useful Reframe: The Problem Isn’t Having Thoughts —> It’s Getting Hooked by Them

The mind is a storyteller. It predicts, judges, compares, replays, warns, and tries to protect you from discomfort. Sometimes it does that brilliantly. Other times it creates a lot of noise.

ACT often uses the idea of being “hooked”:

• Hooked looks like: “If I feel anxious, I can’t go.”

• Unhooked looks like: “I’m noticing anxiety is here… and I can choose what I do next.”

That shift sounds small, but it can change the whole pattern.

Instead of asking, “How do I stop feeling this?”, ACT leans into a different question:

“What would I do if I made room for this feeling — and acted on purpose anyway?”

What ACT Focuses On (without the jargon)

ACT has a few core skill areas, usually practised in a very practical, real-life way:

1. Learning to notice your inner world
   Thoughts, feelings, body sensations, urges — not to analyse them endlessly, but to recognise what’s showing up.

2. Unhooking from thoughts
   You don’t have to argue with every thought or prove it wrong to loosen its grip. Sometimes the work is simply: “Ah, there’s that thought again.”

3. Making space for feelings
   This doesn’t mean liking them or resigning yourself to them. It means allowing them to be present without needing to control them immediately.

4. Coming back to the present
   ACT often includes mindfulness, but not in a “sit on a mountain” way — more like “can I notice what’s happening right now, in this moment, in this body?”

5. Clarifying what matters
   Values in ACT are like a compass, not a checklist. They’re about direction — the kind of person you want to be, and what you want your life to stand for.

6. Taking meaningful steps
   Small, doable actions that align with your values — even if the mind is loud or emotions are uncomfortable.

Values: The Part That Makes ACT Feel Different

A lot of people find ACT lands differently because it puts meaning back in the centre.

Rather than focusing only on symptom reduction, ACT asks:

• What matters enough to move toward?

• What kind of relationships do you want to build?

• What do you want to practise being, even on hard days?

Values might sound like:

• “I want to be more present with my kids.”

• “I want to show up with integrity at work.”

• “I want to make room for rest without guilt.”

• “I want to be honest, even when it’s uncomfortable.”

And then therapy becomes about gently building behaviour that supports that direction.

What ACT Might Look Like Day-to-Day

ACT is often practical and surprisingly applicable to real moments, like:

• Noticing the urge to avoid an email… and taking one small step anyway

• Feeling anxiety before a social event… and choosing connection in a manageable way

• Hearing an inner critic… and responding with a more grounded, compassionate stance

• Recognising burnout signs earlier… and taking actions that protect your energy

Sometimes the goal is not “feel good” — it’s “live well” with whatever feelings are present.

Who Might Explore ACT?

People sometimes explore ACT when they’re dealing with:

• Anxiety, worry, or persistent overthinking

• Stress, work pressure, or burnout

• Low mood or disconnection from meaning

• Perfectionism or harsh self-criticism

• Avoidance patterns (procrastination, withdrawing, staying small)

• Adjusting to painful experiences, uncertainty, or major life changes

ACT can also be integrated with other evidence-based approaches (including CBT), depending on your needs and goals.

ACT via Telehealth

ACT can be delivered effectively via telehealth. Sessions might include guided exercises, short mindfulness practices, values clarification, and planning small steps you can practise between sessions.

Some people like telehealth because the skills can be applied in real time, in the environment where life actually happens — home, work, relationships, daily routines.

If You’re Curious

If you feel like you’ve been fighting your inner world for a long time, ACT may be one approach to explore. The aim is not to eliminate normal human discomfort — it’s to increase your capacity to respond with choice, and move toward a life that feels more aligned.

If you’re considering ACT, speaking with a registered psychologist can help you work out whether it fits what you’re looking for.

If you are in crisis or need immediate support, please contact 000, Lifeline (13 11 14), or your local emergency services.

References

Hayes, S. C., Strosahl, K. D., & Wilson, K. G. (2016). Acceptance and commitment therapy: The process and practice of mindful change (2nd ed.). Guilford Press.

A-Tjak, J. G. L., Davis, M. L., Morina, N., Powers, M. B., Smits, J. A. J., & Emmelkamp, P. M. G. (2015). A meta-analysis of the efficacy of acceptance and commitment therapy for clinically relevant mental and physical health problems. Psychotherapy and Psychosomatics, 84(1), 30–36. https://doi.org/10.1159/000365764

General information only. This article isn’t a substitute for personalised assessment, diagnosis, or treatment.